Tuesday, August 08, 2006

A post on self esteem

self esteem

Self-esteem reflects whether a person loves, accepts, and believes in who they are. The simplest way to raise a person's self-esteem is to improve that person's way of thinking and add reason to the same. This is easy, thereasons have to be right and should appeal to the person and/or group self-esteem will grow by adopting these thinking patterns:

  1. Rediscover and reaffirm your personal strengths: Sometimes you have to take a new inventory on what you like about your looks, smile, body, sexiness, health, personality, and character strengths. For areas you don't feel real positive about, try to be more accepting of those unique features (example: nose or ears).Still if you want go ahead and change your appearance - people have become black and white too.Be yourself and natural - it works for most of us.
  2. Figure out the hidden strengths in your so-called weaknesses: There is always a positive in every negative if you look hard enough. For instance, you may think of yourself as stubborn, but the flipside is that you're also persistent and dependable.You might waste your time surfing the net - it is quite possible you could come up with the next big idea - you need to find your guru,friends,philosophers and guides online.
  3. Make a long list of your personal breakthroughs: Think of times when you did something that you thought that never could do but managed to pull off successfully. These breakthroughs can generate an authentic source of never-ending pride in you. (Example: speaking up at a meeting,winning a prize in school,sourcing an important component,writing a novel etc.)
  4. Negative comparisons: These are best avoided. Human beings can amplify or reduce their value by contrasting themselves either positively or negatively with others. The most common trait of persons who have developed low self-esteem are to diminish themselves by contrasting how they don't measure up to others.As long as you are doing positive things and earning the bread and growing personally and professionally ignore comparisons.
  5. Stop the critic inside of you: Some people have a nasty habit of putting themselves down often. They say damaging things to themselves like, "I'm always late. Why am I such a flake?" or "There I go again, stupid!" Get in the new habit of catching yourself saying critical things about yourself and learn to silence your inner critic.Be positive and accept that a person makes mistakes - a person who does not make mistakes is not really taking enough risks.It is better to do what you have always loved than be called a wimp or sissy forever.
  6. Blaming yourself for mistakes in the past: Some things are only minimally in your control, but people who develop low self-esteem take the full blame for the resulting negative outcomes. Instead, learn to honor your efforts and give proper credit for things that you have done well.Like in the previous post accet that all make mistakes - have you tried to correct your own mistakes (think about it) - the ones in your control.A corrected mistake is a sureshot way to end the blame game!
  7. Have more compassion for yourself: Realize the adversity of life can make you a stronger and more understanding person. The pain that you have suffered in the past can help you relate to a wider array of people. Your suffering makes you more human if you choose to channel it that way.How many other people have you helped besides yourself?
  8. Be your own cheerleader: The energy and enthusiasm of a cheerleader is necessary in order to make the radical emotional changes required to raise your self-esteem. Use this analogy to illustrate how you talk to yourself, handle adversity, and summon up the courage to pursue your interests. Being your own cheerleader isn't silly, it's smart and contagious.Of course you have to cheer yourself - be your own cheerleader - it is not difficult - stop being indifferent and care for yourself too for a change and do it one thing at a time - say a pat on the back for doing a good thing a day.
  9. Learn something new: Do you like being bored - you might other people do not - it is important to learn something new everytime and keep yourself occupied.
  10. Teach others : Find what they want first and then pass on what you know to the people it is important that you be interesting enough to the people you want something from or else if you do not care who does?Think about it!

The Bottom Line: High self-esteem is attractive and low self-esteem is not. You really want to attract, get, keep,become successful,be able to contribute and enjoy love and acceptance,then it is very important to maintain a high level of self-esteem to keep oneself interested and occupied - the alternative is be boring,stupid, cynical,uncared for,pitied upon,cranky,always whining and complaining - the former is any day better than the latter in my opinion.

There is not a single person on earth who has not made mistakes - have we learnt from our mistakes or not and if yes what are we doing to change for the better ?

Thanks for reading - I know for sure this post will bring greater change and make people more compassionate,less indifferent and more positive.



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